Isn’t it amazing how time flies by when you’re having fun? But then when you’re awake staring at the clock at 1:30 in the morning you realize how slow the seconds tic by… My last post was short but to the point. Yes we were referred for IVF and no we can’t afford it at this time. How have I been taking it? Not well at all to be honest. My emotions have been up and down and then more up and more down. Sometimes I think I can forget about having a family all together and other days it’s the only thing I want.

So we’ve come to long hard decision to wait. Why? The main reason is our financial situation, our only option right now is to finance the cost and it’s so ridiculous. Seriously, it’s 600 dollars a month, ready for this part, for SIX YEARS!!!! Who the hell has that kind of cash laying around for 6 years? Not me. My child would be in the kindergarten or first grade by the time I pay that loan off….not to mention children are expensive on their own so lets tack on an additional 600 dollar payment a month so you can’t afford to feed the one thing you want so damn badly.  Another option would be to do something like a GoFundMe page but I’m not really someone who puts it all out there and asks for donations, it makes me feel uncomfortable. So in a way that’s out of the question too.

A plus to all this is we’re young, I’m 23 and my hubs is 24. I just put in an application to go back to school and I’m going to try to focus on that for awhile. Also, we plan to buy a house next year when our lease is up, so I’m hoping to put savings up for that. Lastly, we’ve decided to spend all the extra money we have right now on making new memories together this summer. We have spent the last year on paying for fertility this and fertility that, do this, try that, buy this, pay for that, pee on this during these cycle days, pee on that before you begin your next round of meds….blah blah blah. So far this month we’ve spent every weekend together doing something fun and memorable. I can’t wait to see what the rest of the spring/summer has to offer. We have some plans in mind but other things are just up in the air. We are kind of just winging it and seeing where life takes us for now. I’m not giving up on Baby Yingling just yet, I’m just taking some time to refind my marriage and remember why we want a family. Not remember all the things I’ve peed on and all the times I’ve had someone else look at my or touch my lady bits. It will be a nice change to not have a doctor or a nurse exploring down there for awhile haha!!!!

I will try and give you guys updates as we have fun and I will of course be wishing you all baby dust and hope that someone out there gets some success in this terribly long journey to conceive! Good luck ladies!

As always


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